Eco Unfriendly
The Professor: Good luck! And Skunk-Ape? Thanks again for safely disposing of my little GARBAGE PROBLEM.
Skunk-Ape: Er… Yeah…’Safely…’
Howie: I’m guessing he means the radioactive material in your garbage pile that created our giant pumpkin?
Skunk-Ape: AND his giant kitten.
The Professor: And REMEMBER, Howie! One sip per day of the wolf serum, or it’s dog food for dinner for the rest of your life!
(earth shakes and a very loud ‘meow’ is heard with giant footfalls indicating the imminent arrival of enormous and apparently hungry kitten)
The Professor: Why did I say ‘dinner’?
Safe Mode
(Evil Future-Robot is putting up a banner for the Full Moon Festival.)
Vampire: Little higher.
(Evil Future-Robot is carrying a car. Vampire is a bat.)
Vampire: Careful with that!
(Evil Future-Robot is polishing the spotlight)
Vampire: Polish clockwise!
Evil Future-Robot: Ok, that’s IT. You know, just ’cause I’m a robot, doesn’t mean I’m your PERSONAL SLAVE.
(Vampire is pushing a button on Evil Future-Robot’s back.)
Vampire: GUH. Rebooting him every two hours is SUCH hard work.
Evil Future-Robot: Ready for instructions!
Preparations
Skunk-Ape: The good news is that by the time the moon comes out, we’ll all be in the auditorium for the presentations. The bad news is that when you’re on stage, the spotlight will be on you.
Skunk-Ape: (explaining a complicated diagram) It uses the moonlight, so make sure you take the wolf serum before you go on stage. You’ll have twelve minutes before it wears off, so let’s synchronise watches.
Howie: Wow, Skunk-Ape. Youve really put a lot of thought into this. You know, I feel a lot safer with you around. Skunk-Ape?
Skunk-Ape: (testing both walkie talkies simultaneously) Skunk-Ape to Skunk-Ape, what is your status? Hairy and handsome, repeat, HAIRY… AND… HANDSOME. Skunk-Ape out.
Meet A Monster #4: Henry Poltergeist
Henry: Please, Miss Gorgon. May I have some more?
Miss Gorgon: Why, Henry Poltergeist! Could it be your manners are improving?
Miss Gorgon: Of course you may have some more.
Henry: Thaaank you.
Miss Gorgon: Wait. Since when do ghosts need to eat?
(Miss Gorgon gets hit forcibly in face with Henry’s food)
Trial Run
Skunk-Ape: Wolf serum trial run in 3… 2… 1… GO!
Howie: I THINK IT’S WORKING!
Howie: This is awesome!
Skunk-Ape: It’s ok, I guess.
Howie: You’re upset because my coat is shinier, aren’t you?
Skunk-Ape: I bet you don’t even have fleas.
Reflections
Howie: You know, apart from the whole ANTI-HUMAN theme, this festival’s actually pretty great. Our giant pumpkin won first prize…
Howie: …The ghost train has real ghosts…
Skunk-Ape: Hey, Stuart.
Howie: … and the fairy floss was made by real fairies! Still, I wonder what Vampire is up to.
Vampire: (Outside the hall of mirrors) I want my money back!
Siren Song
Howie: Oh no! I got so wound up about thwarting Vampire that I forgot to prepare a speech!
Skunk-Ape: Shh! The concert’s starting. Fasten your seatbelt.
Howie: Seatbelt? Why do we need–
Compere: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome our very own chart-toppers: THE SIRENS! (Crowd yells yay!)
Siren’s song: Doesn’t matter what we sing, Our voices are enchanting, On our album we just hum, And it still went platinum.
Howie: (trance-like) Such beautiful music…
This Is It
Compere: And now, Howard Busby will present his giant pumpkin to Miss Gorgon’s Ophanage.
Howie: This is it. WOLFTIME.
Vampire: This is it! soon I won’t be the only Vampire in town anymore!
Miss Gorgon: This is it! Remember, kids, big smiles when you’re on stage! Wait. Where’s Howie?
Henry: (standing behind giant pumpkin) I can’t WAIT to drop this thing on the audience!
I Spy
Compere: Please welcome the little werewolf with the big heart… Howard Busby! (Applause.)
Vampire: (Looking through a telescope.) He’s… he’s a… HOW? He’s either become a real werewolf or– wait a minute. What’s that in his pocket?
Vampire: A-ha! A potion. Very clever. I wonder how long the effects last…?
Evil Future-Robot: Excuse me, can I have that back now? (The telescope is Robot’s eye and you can totally see inside his head.)
The Countdown Begins
Howie: Um… I hereby present this giant pumpkin to Miss Gorgon’s orphanage. I hope you kids like pumpkin! Woo, made it with ten minutes to spare.
Miss Gorgon: Before you go, Howie, we’re got a little surprise for you!
Miss Gorgon: The children would like to perform a short play!
Miss Gorgon: Now folks, I know it’s not on the program, but I’m sure you won’t mind us taking ten minutes to say thanks to this little guy.
Howie: Oh boy.