Monsterhood

Fish Dude: Hey, siren? can you help me out with a few chords?
Siren: i dont actually know anything about music. people buy my albums solely because of my enchanted voice.
Fish Dude: dont sell yourself short. i bet theres more to it than that. maybe its the lyrics?
Siren: This is my latest single.
Fish Dude: should that be THE party… or partyING?
Siren: the real question is: should it sell for 3 million copies?

Fish Dude: we can digitally remove the magic from your voice with this software. then we’ll rerelease dont stop party and let it stand solely on its artistic merits. this will prove to you that theres more to your songs than just your enchanted voice.
Siren: if you say so.
[she starts singing]
Siren: Dont stop party Dont stop party i just want to da-a-ance sokeep the party pumpin cause its party what i are here for play my favouritest so-o-ong DJ bring the beat like it never got brung before Dont stop party Dont stop party…

Fish dude: an experimental new sound from the monstrous songstress isnt hitting the right notes with fans. and as for the lyrics, lets just say that siren is no byron.
Siren: this is the same song that went to number one a few weeks ago! so i am only successful because of my enchanted voice! or i was, before you digital removed my career!
Fish dude: im sorry! your voice affects me too. it wasnt until i heard it through the filter that i realised how bad that song is. are you gonna hit me?
Siren: no… you’re gonna hit you.
[Fish dude punches himself in the face]

Fish dude: siren, im sorry! you just seemed down about the whole magic voice thing. i was just trying to show you theres more than that!
Siren: all you’ve shown me is that i dont need to try so hard when im writing lyrics anymore. Gimme that! (grabs shopping list)
Mummified Pharaoh: wha…?
[Album cover that says ‘BREAD, MILK, EGGS’]

Fish dude: i dont get it dad. everytime i feel like im getting close to a girl, thye end up getting angry and storming off!
Fish dudes dad: dont worry about it son. its just one of those things that work itself out naturally as you get older.
Fish dude: i see. you’re saying its like learning the guitar, right? its just something that comes with practice.
Fish dudes dad: no. im saying one day soon your skin will dry out like mine and you’ll have to cover yourself with swamp juice every hour. then girls wont go anywhere near you!

Swamp Creature: After the invisible man saved the town, the committee decided to put up a statue in his honour. we’ve ordered a special high tension, low visibility wire to hold up the hat. but it wont be ready til next week. but they wanna unveil it today. any ideas?
Miss Gorgon:. i may just have one solution.
[Henry holds the hat in place]
Swamp Creature: this will be good for you Henry. Just think! stop being such a delinquent and you could be the next invisible man!

Howie: i dont understand. you were doing all the this charity work anyway.
Henry: right, but as the invisible man. i know it sounds crazy, but i feel like i need to be someone else to help people out. Henry doesnt do that sort of thing. the invisible man on the other hand… its kinda like he was superman and im Clark Kent.
Howie: Clark Kent doesnt fill people shoes with maple syrup.
Henry: well, he was always too mild-mannered if you ask me.

Howie: A headless horse? nice try henry. so this is the new disguise? i mean the man in kinda shoddy. you couldnt find some better clothes? horse is passable, though. so what is it? animantronics? or you got a couple guys in there?
Henry: Howie, what do you think of my new disgui– oh, hey a headless horseman!

Howie: a package? oh, you’re the postman! thanks! ‘private and confidential.’ and there’s no return address.
Henry: open it! open it!
Howie: It’s for skunk-ape.
Henry: open it! open it!
Howie: Henry thats against the law.
Henry: I am the law!
Howie: a policeman disguise doesnt make you a cop.
Henry: tell it to the judge hotshot.
Howie: movie phrases dont either.
Henry: You wont be seeing many where you’re going. Jail.