Science Ignorant Disney Films

Aladdin and Jasmine on a magic carpet. Aladdin is holding up his smartphone for Jasmine to see.

Aladdin: (singing) I can show you the world… (speaking) is flat. This two hour YouTube will explain everything.

Olaf from Frozen standing in the snow rolling his eyes.

Olaf: (sarcastically.) Oh, look. More snow. But suuure, Earth’s getting warmer.

Goofy is standing with his arms crossed.

Goofy: If Goofies evolved from Plutos, then why are there still Plutos?

Voicemail

A man listens to his smartphone.

Phone: You have… one… new voicemail… and… one… old voicemail.

Phone: …and… one… extremely old voicemail.

Man: …the hell?

He taps to hear the message with a boop.

A cavaman stands in front of the trunk of a dead mammoth, talking on a chunky old mobile phone with the aerial and everything.

Caveman: Oh… uh… Ogg call to say Ogg kill mammoth. So… that all. Ogg just keep you in loop re: mammoth stuff. Anyhoo, hit Ogg back. It Ogg, by the way.

Mister Steal Yo Girl

The classiest, best dressed man you’ve ever seen struts in. Another man sees him.

Other man: Here comes Mister Steal Yo’ Girl!

Well dressed man: Please! Call me Derek. MISTER Steal Yo’ Girl is my father.

Well dressed man: He’s also your father.

Doublehorse

A cowboy rides two horses into town.

Tex: Yes sir! Yes sir! I just bought myself a brand new doublehorse!

Cowboy 2: Ain’t what folks have been sayin’ round town, Tex.

Cowboy 2: Rumour is you bought two regular horses and some glue then you done stuck ’em together.

Tex: No sir! No sir!

Tex: (now out of earshot) Actually, I bought three regular horses and made my own glue.